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Wednesday, May 29, 2013

Stupid Phobias: the return

Here are some more phobias I found on a list that I think are ridiculous. I will attempt to draw them in a way that will make us ALL feel just a little bit more afraid, though. Because it's important to be afraid all the time; otherwise you would get killed probably.


Agyiophobia: The fear of being in the street

How can anyone be afraid of being in the street? That's ridiculous. The street is just how you get from Point A to Point B.

Unless ...



Hmmm, maybe the real problem here is

 Cyprianophobia: The fear of prostitutes


A perfectly reasonable fear.

Defecalgesiophobia: The fear of painful bowel movements



Dude ... eat some fiber. Seriously.

Gymnophobia: The fear of naked bodies


Ahh!

Kathisophobia: The fear of sitting down

Haha what an IDIOT. Do I look like this when I sit down? TELL ME AND BE HONEST. I'll never sit again!

Lachanophobia: The fear of vegetables


GET OUT OF HERE TOMATO YOU'RE A F**KING FRUIT.


Melissophobia: The fear of bears

You guys, how could ANYONE be afraid of bears?!?!?!?



OH MY GOD don't ever do a Google image search for "bear attack."

I'M F**KING SERIOUS DON'T EVER DO A GOOGLE SEARCH FOR THAT.

EVER.

It's just ... I can't ... oh god.


This blog post is over. I can't stop picturing that busted-ass leg. Jesus.

WHY DID I LOOK AT THAT.

WHAT DID I THINK WAS GOING TO HAPPEN.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

2 comments:

  1. I have an irrational fear of bears.
    I am also stoked to find out the defecalgesiophobia one... now if I can figure out how to say it, I can say it to my spouse ALL THE TIME, because, um, my spouse for reals has that.

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    Replies
    1. Haha if you were to do the Google image search I subjected myself to, you would see that a fear of bears is PERFECTLY RATIONAL.

      Defecalgesiophobia, though ... well, I eat a lot of fiber so I don't have to stress about that one. But I can imagine it being a tough thing to live with day after day. Never knowing if this is going to be the poop that blows your butthole totally inside-out. Because that can happen. IT CAN HAPPEN. I wonder if "the fear of pooping so hard your butthole turns inside out" is its own phobia, or is it part of the defecalgesiaphobia?

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