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Friday, January 31, 2014

Let's play Google!!

Instead of writing up a real post today, I decided to take a journey through the collective consciousness of everyone on the internet.

It was eye-opening. 

Here's what Google suggested for some dangerous autocompletes as I fed it a few loaded questions. To get the maximum amusement out of this, please imagine that one guy is googling all these things. Imagine the kind of life this fellow probably has. Imagine he looks like this:


You want to shop at Target? Do you value your f***ing life at all? Just sit at home and drink urine. You'll be safe there.



For you? Yes, to all of it.

This one got me a little curious, though. What else are people putting in their mouths that they shouldn't be??


Why is everyone so curious about eating feces?!?

I wonder what else we do that is as dangerous as eating rat poison! Let's find out:


I'm guessing "no" but then again I'm not a doctor. o_O


Next, I decided to delve a little deeper into the relationships between men and women. 


Pretty much summed up women right there.


Honestly, it's like poetry!

I think we've got a pretty solid grasp now on how men and women see each other. What changes once they're married?


Oh dear. Sounds like the wives are pretty fed up with their husbands.



Uhh, make that REALLY fed up with their husbands.

But why is everyone so angry??! Why aren't these spouses making each other happy?? Let's find out:





Ahh, I see. The problem is, nobody's getting laid. But why not?





*headdesk*

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