So, I make sure to remember to always say "please" and "thank you" to Audrey.
Sometimes this is hard, though. For example:
"Don't use Mommy's hair as a rope to help you stand up in the bed please."
Babies shouldn't be standing up in the bed anyway. It always ends badly.
"Do NOT roll over and crawl away while there's still poop on your bum, please!"
I cropped this one instead of drawing a poopy butt because I want you to like me.
"You cannot play inside the refrigerator. Please come here so Mommy can close it." [cue loud, angry crying as baby is forcibly removed from refrigerator] "Thank you."
Seriously, as soon as that fridge door opens, she's there. She's like your roommate's stoner friend who's been living on your couch for the past three weeks.
"Don't update Mommy's Facebook please."
If you see something like this, either Audrey got my phone or I'm having a stroke. You should hit "like" either way, because it's the polite thing to do.
"DO NOT REACH INTO THE TOILET. PLEASE."
WE DO NOT DO SPLISH SPLASH IN THE TOILET. PLEASE AND THANK YOU.
So there you have it, guys. Always be polite to your kid, and they will probably grow up to be a wonderful part of society.
Or maybe just a good kindergarten teacher.